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PurpleFlyingMonkeys · Aug 12, 2012, 07:37 PM

So... Since elementary school I remember restricting myself, always wanting to lose weight. Always wishing I looked different, always thinking I was "fat" or just not right. I had a pretty bad eating disorder until I was 17 and got on the depo shot.

Before I was 19 I had gained 80 pounds. I was very over weight, doctors became concerned. Especially when I became pregnant. I ended up gaining another 30 pounds, I was about 100 pounds over weight.

So my daughter was 3 months old when I decided to lose the weight. I dieted for 8 months, lost almost all of the weight. I'm no longer underweight like I had been most of my life, but I'm at the low range of healthy now, I'm not too skinny, not too big at all. I love the size I am. But...

A 9 pound baby and 80 pounds lost later, I had terrible stretch marks and extra skin on my belly. My belly button looks like ground up hamburger meat. Although it's been almost 4 years, and the stretch marks have faded a heck of a lot, and the extra skin has gotten much better, I still see the flaws. I've been this way for my whole life, my midsection has ALWAYS been my most insecure area of my body, my whole life. Especially since all the damage from the pregnancy and the weight loss.

Now the problem is my fiance and I are not arguing but "serious talking" about this today. He says by now (almost 3 years) I should be over it completely and be completely comfortable in front of him. Running in place in the nude, jumping jacks in the nude, you know all that not so appealing things for someone with loose skin.

But I'm not, I've always had trouble with my appearance. I've really been working on it and have come quite a ways since the beginning but he I guess expected me to be completely comfortable and free by 3 years. He thinks it's my comfort level with him, he doesn't realize it's the issues I have with myself. I tell him until I'm blue in the face but he just doesn't get it. He expects me to just walk around him nakid (which I do on occassion) and shower (which I have started to do) with him and be on top topless (which I have started to work on) and now because he asked if I would run in place nude in front of him and I said "Maybe with my top pulled down" it upset him...

He's not a bad guy and is normally patient but this seems to be a topic quite a bit lately and I just don't know what to do.I love him and I've been working on my issues for a long time, I've been this way my whole life, but I've come a long way already but it's like since I'm not all the way comfortable it's not enough. I don't know what to do or say. Help please?!