Quote:
Originally Posted by LolaCabanna
Does anyone else ever feel guilty for spending money on themselves? I love buying things for my partner,kids and grand kids and tend to over spend on them. I put my needs last. I'll buy my partner stuff she wants and then wear clothes that are too big or glasses that are broke because I feel guilty spending money on me.
|
Always. My T and I were discussing this in my last session. I feel like I have to justify every purchase for myself...want never comes in to it. If I just want something, then I don't deserve to have it. I can only have stuff if I need it or can justify it.
My T has asked me to try and change the questions I ask myself before buy things. Instead of my first question being "can I justify this" or "do I deserve this", she wants me to ask "do I need it? Do I want it? Why?" And the why should be just an open curiosity, not an attempt to justify. It's hard, but I like the way it feels to just try and figure out why I want something rather than how I can justify it. I like being able to meet the things I want without feeling guilty because I couldn't justify it. It's a constant challenge not to slip back in to feeling guilty and needing to justify things, though.