hey there . I totally understand the urge, but the 1 thing that has stopped the latest cycle of SI for me is looking at all my scars, and also the shame of getting dressed while no2 is in the room and she is staring at all of them. While neither of the kids have ever asked me about them (ok, it's a bit early for no2 to be able to!!) I'm sure they will one day and I am in no way prepared for that. Take care of yourself, and stay strong ok