i can certainly relate to your pain, brokenandalone.
the sad truth tho is the
only person that can get your dad sober is
himself. the lure of alcohol and his compulsion to drink shows he's not ready to stop drinking imho. alcoholics unfortunately need to "hit a bottom" to get the wake-up call. many do not heed the message that their life is out of control and they keep drinking anyway and a lower bottom occurs. it sounds like he hasn't lost enough in his eyes to wake up and get help. many never get sober and live a dismal, unmanageable life with many negative consequences. you have tried to help him but it isn't working cause he's not ready. i do hope he will get sober but only time will tell.
my suggestion is for you is to move on with your life keeping the focus on
YOU. al-anon meetings may help you too. there's lots of support there. many ppl have gone thru what you are going thru.
if you haven't done this already you can tell your dad how his drinking has affected your life. how sad you are but you know only he can want to get sober. that only he can take back his life. set boundaries with him. such as, you won't disrupt your life to drive him to rehabs etc. to not call or visit you drunk. suggest AA for him. if he's not living near you write him a letter. after that move on. you deserve the right to live your own life without his insanity.
i know this may sound harsh but it is true. you can't 'carry" the drunk.
live your own life with JOY. love and support your sister. let her know that no one can help him get sober. it's up to him.
here's a helpful article for YOU:
Quote:
Guidelines to help you dealing with an alcoholic in the family
#1 Never cover up for them
If you think you are helping by let’s say phoning their boss to call in sick or making excuses for them, you are making a big mistake. This will only let them believe that you are OK with their drinking problem and they will just continue drinking. Do not hide their problem. The consequences of their actions will be their responsibility. Once you cover up, it’s a sign for enabling them to drink....ETC.
#5 Let the alcoholic hit the bottom
Sometimes this is the only way. We have heard too many stories how alcoholic finally overcome their addiction because they have hit the ground and learned their lessons. If you really love them and want to help, you need to let them fall so they know the consequences of their action.
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http://thealcoholwithdrawalsymptoms....-family-member
i hope my reply is helpful. i'm sorry you have this painful experience.