I thought that I would include some additional information by sharing what I experience. The following italic text is from an email that I wrote to a neurotypical family member:

We have two different ways of communicating, that we both interpret differently. I tend to hear words. You sense hidden meanings behind them. Looking for those messages is not innate to me. When I do look, I am usually wrong. This is perfect for misunderstanding.

Relationships are not my forte nor is expression. Things most people find easy are difficult and unnatural to me. It does not mean, I don't care or feel; I just don't know how to show it very well or what to do. When I do know what to do, it often does not feel right, because I don't feel the emotion behind it. It feels like deception. Yuck! My problems with imagining what others feel makes it difficult, too. Feelings seem to be muted in those circumstances. Sometimes, my feelings are also delayed. This can appear as if I lack empathy, but I don't.

My sensitive nature or my 'thin skin' is how I navigate relationships. (I assume everyone feels like me.) It compensates for my weaknesses in the other areas, that I have mentioned in the previous paragraph. I use it as my guide to show what I hope is respect.

My bouts of silence are actually me processing what I have heard. People have noticed my moments of silence and usually misconstrue that as me being offended or uncomfortable. It is not.

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Social interaction is such a challenge for me that I have sought therapy to improve it so that I can relate to the neurotypical world better. Now, I am learning and realizing how this impacts relationships and all kinds of interaction with others.

One strategy I came up with is rules:

My use of rules also helps. Eg. I will not discuss my areas of expertise or ‘special interests’ with anyone. It takes effort but I do it to protect myself from criticism and boring others. I used to hear comments such as, “Okay, enough now” or “You are so boring” frequently.

Another rule I have is not to intrude. Sometimes, I can ask a lot of questions because I cannot figure out how someone feels. I try very hard to limit them so I don’t come across as nosey. Interpreting nonverbal signs is hard for me, even the emotions our faces convey. I have to compensate somehow, and right now it is with questions.

Show interest in others. Ask. People like that so I set this as another rule.

Without these rules to guide me, I forget. For most this is almost effortless, but to me it is tiring. I try.

I just hope this helps reduce the chances of coming across as arrogant, intimidating, shy, quiet, and boring.
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Body language is another issue for most people with an ASD. Most don't know how to use it properly or it does not match the emotion the person is feeling. My affect is usually muted but can be blunted depending on my anxiety levels and the situation.

Obviously, there is a lot more to body language than what I have just mentioned from the clothes we wear to tone of voice. I have never paid much attention to this, since I have always relied on voice. Looking for these faint signals is work, since I have to think and interpret them.

Often, I behave in a certain way because I am concentrating on what is being said or something internal is going on.

Here are some examples:

#1. I am a super smeller who easily gets nauseated. If one smells bad, I tend to keep 3 or 4 feet away. Some people are disturbed by this. I do it because I don’t want to gag in front of them. Do you want to see me throw up?

#2. When I talk with people, I rarely make eye contact. I have never done this, because I cannot focus on the other person’s words. I am not disinterested or trying to deceive.

#3. When I fold my arms or cross my legs it is for comfort. I don’t do that to let others know I am mad or want to be left alone.

I tend not to imply what I want with body language. I just ask.

My quiet and vague nature can deter people from getting to know me. My therapist pointed out that this can appear as if I am shutting people out when I have no such intention. Getting information out of me can take effort and wear people out. It can even anger some. This usually causes them to back off. Sometimes, I need to think about what a feel, since identifying feelings is a challenge.
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Life for me is existing in the periphery. Friendships have never been easy. I was the most unpopular kid in my school. Even at 34, I still struggle, since I am not charismatic. People tend to find me unlikeable or don't want to bother. It is depressing but I have accepted this. I make up for it in other ways.

I have decided to share my experience to let others know what living with an ASD is like. It is brutal but it isn’t a curse. It is a part of me that I cannot deny.