((((Shish)))) I can relate. I refuse to speak with her ever again. I feel cheated, as well. My mother was emotionally invalidating and selfish. My father would not do a thing about it (avoidant).

You are not alone. It can be very, very hard at times. I totally get that. But NOT being around her is much better than even giving a teeny bit. She is a vampire. The one thing I am so grateful for is now that I understand what happened, the type of person she is/was, I have an opportunity to understand & heal (even after being hurt so deeply).

Even though she did her best to convince me otherwise, there was NOTHING ever "wrong" or "embarrassing" about me. Someone was very kind to send me a link to the explanation of emotional invalidation and how incredibly damaging it is...things are MUCH clearer to me now and I have hope.

Best wishes to you,

R