I honestly don't know. I remember at a later age telling my brother and sister I though I was an alien. They remember it too. I think it was from watching the "Twilight Zone" too much. Seriously, almost all alcoholics had that strange feeling of not quite belonging for as long they can remember. It is a feeling which tends to make one distrustful and fearful of others. I don't know it is an instinct gone awry or a genetic thing.