I made this blog just so I could vent.

I lost my best friend last year. We're not best friends anymore. You know why? She got a boyfriend. Thats exactly why. Go figure.

We stopped hanging out and it's only because she couldn't make the littlest amount of time for us. She only hungout with her ****** *** boyfriend.

It sucks. It sucks that she threw something away like that. 11 years of friendship. 11 YEARS. I don't think I'll ever meet somebody like her. I shared everything with her, literally. We rarely argued, whenever we did, it was for like 10 minutes. Now all of a sudden since we've stopped being friends, everything is going downhill. I have no body to talk to. I have 2 bestfriends, but I can't share everything with both of them. I feel like everything just sucks. I'm in tears writing this but oh well. I smoke weed way too much, my grades are falling apart. I'm partying too much. I need to get my **** together. I have anxiety problems and I'm extremely self conscious. Can't do anything about it. I feel like my mom thinks i'm just so stupid and she doesn't understand anything whenever I try to talk to her. Thanks for the support mom, thanks a lot. I feel like nothing works out with guys anymore either. All of my friends are in serious relationships and i'm just here like, oh. I get ****ed over all of the time and I'm just considered as a booty call to everyone. The point in life is to go through rough times and good times, yes I know that. I don't know why but I feel like this is just the end. Everything is going so downhill. I don't care if I've already said that. It's true. I'm lazy now, I can't go through with anything. School- I pull of the dgaf attitude and already failed my first math test. Great. Diet- horrible. I can't even stand working out now. I used to love working out. I can't even get my damn drivers permit. You know why? I'm lazy. This blog is my blog to explain to you how depressed and emotional I currently am, & whats exactly going on in my mind. This blog is to let everything out and start over. Monday is in 2 days. I'm writing everything down. What I'm gonna do, what I'm not gonna do. How I'm gonna improve. I'm gonna blog again next week and i'm gonna be one happy girl. Everything is gonna be better. If not. who ****ing cares. Because I'm one strong 16 year old girl who can get my **** together. I'm not ready to break down. I'm ready for a new me. Period. The End.