Quote:
Originally Posted by skycastle
My mind is taken over with so many obsessive thoughts about therapy and psychology and theories and definitions and practices. In all of that, I think I have lost myself.
Am I even a person anymore?
Have I lost my freedom to think for myself, to define myself?
Why am I so obsessed with these people, these therapists, who know so very little of myself and my life? Why do I invest so much in them?
I spend every waking moment thinking about these things I have read in books or websites or forums about psychotherapy, or thinking about interactions I've had in psychotherapy. I think I've ruined myself. I don't know how to cut myself free.
I wonder if I would heal faster if I just cut myself free of the whole thing and found an entirely new and different life somehow. Maybe I need to move to a tropical island and build my own house by hand  I just wish the thoughts would stop. I don't want to spend my every moment in my week planning and thinking about the 1 hour I have in the therapy room. I want to spend my 1 hour in the therapy room planning and thinking about all that I want to invest in during my week.
Just some thoughts. |
lol, put all that knowledge to good use and major in psychology! You'll be at the top in your program!
Ok, I said that as a joke, but in all seriousness that is what I did- I wanted to know so much that I did enroll in a Psych BA (and finished it) and am looking to move on to my Masters or Psy.D. If you are able to redirect your thoughts in this way, too, you might surprise yourself :-) If not, just try to do something physical- beach, gym, swim, etc... having a plan that involves my body and having fun usually helps me turn off thoughts about my therapist and my twice a week therapy hours.