Thanks for the replies everybody. Tricaridch - Unfortunately I have no option over the number of courses I take - it's a post graduate certificate in Fraud Examination and Forensic Accounting and everyone has to take the same 12 classes - 6 per semester. I know it's a heavy load and wish I could ease into it, but that doesn't work with this program.

As for my brother and the part time job thing it's just that he's trying to be helpful but he doesn't understand my challenges or get why I can't stay sober. He's a very successful high acheiving workaholic who also has a drinking problem except it doesn't interfere in his life the way mine did. He thinks the key thing is I should be working no matter what. He can't force me obviously but he's very clear in his position. When I told him I was contemplating giving up the teaching so that I could just focus on school he was totally opposed and said it was very important that I can be seen to be working continuously. And I know he's right it's just going to be a challenge.

I'm going to talk to staff on Mon. to see if I can get a packed lunch to take with me to class. It'll be a bit of a drag living on sandwiches for 3 days a week, but I can do it, and if I have to eat in class, I will. I don't imagine it'll be a problem, because everyone knows we have back to back classes.

I'm not going to U of Toronto, I'm going to Seneca College, which thankfully is a lot closer to where I'm living than U of T is. It'll be a bit different for me going to a college rather than a university. I've taken college classes before, and in my experience they were a lot more hands on and actually more work, than the university classes were. And it's really important to me to do well, both so that I'll have a better chance of getting a job, but also to boost my confidence which will help with job hunting.

And GMA you're right, I've got to protect my sobriety at all costs. I kind of feel like this is my last shot at it, because I don't think I'd be able to come back from another relapse, which is why I want to make ongoing aftercare and seeking safety and therapy priorities as well.

I'm just going to have to be super organized, in order to get everything done.

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