Have you ever had someone in your life that teaches you a lot, and makes you happy and is wonderful to be around ... and it kills you when they leave?

I've had a few of those type of individuals. I'm working on a few more of those type of people right now.

I just got an email from a former ESP (Enriched Support Program here at my university - for highschool students who want to be in university but don't have the grades) facilitator of mine.

With his help, and there was a LOT of help from him - I managed to get two very good grades in Intro to Psychology.

He updated me on his life, (he graduated with his Masters in Psychology last year) and he's now working for the federal government and is still involved with his girlfriend and still doing HTML stuff and creating websites and he now owns his own company.

He is an inspiration, and I do wish that life could turn out that way for everyone. Get what you want, with some determination and hard-work.

It just brought back all the stuff he did for me, and how nice it was to be around him. And now it kills me a bit more again to see that he's gone again. I really did like the guy, he was wonderful.

Why is it that everyone that we care about and generally makes your life better leaves eventually? Some sooner than others, but eventually everyone leaves.

And this is why Christina doesn't like getting close to people, because they leave and I become an emotional wreck.

(Another story in a story ... My first T and a person who I had grown really attached to - she was almost like a grandmother to me - left in the same day ... talk about misery! People didn't seem to "get" that sharing little parts of myself with them, and them leaving me was like them taking a part of me and never ever giving it back. Yet another reason why I don't like to get close to people... its too hard.)

I'm not saying that for sympathy, its the truth. I just miss people. Too much.

Does anyone understand me when I say this? I honestly feel horrible now ... hearing from him again completely out of the blue, and then him leaving again. People coming in and out of my life just makes it harder to "get over" them.