this is the same in my family. why are you forgiving the men? I mean, yeah, I get it, cos my dad never stood up to my mom for me either, but he was all I had. so now he's gone and mother and brother kept up the pretense of interest and care until I finally figured it out.

a few years ago, my brother took his wife and kid on a little nature type vacation, afterwards my mother called me crying. I said, you and I can go next year, when the birds come back again. she did one of those teenage-girl snorts that say "you SO don't get it!" then I realized, she didn't want to go, and she didn't want to go with ME - she just wanted to be ASKED to go with them, I think just to prove something to her DIL.

I don't know why we get scapegoated. Well, actually I do - we didn't follow the program of getting married, staying married, and having 2.3 kids - so they feel justified - we 'chose' our sinful hippie lifestyle or whatever, and now we're paying for it. You reap what you sow. Blah blah blah. eff them. They and their little minds suck eggs. Wait til they run into real trouble in their lives, it'll catch up with them.