Quote:
Originally Posted by ExiExi
Went to see a movie with my cousin and his gf yesterday. Had to fake laughter through the whole thing. When it's a funny movie and everyone is laughing their butts off, you can't just sit there with a poker face. Being on my own makes me suicidal, being involved in social activities makes me anxious, miserable and I always walk home with acute feeling of loneliness and disappointment.
I want to feel pleasure again so I can motivate myself into treatment. Or at least trying to find help. Any help. Maybe I could find someone to talk to, start building my own support system. Sometimes I think drugs and alcohol could kick start my brain. Or kill me.. I'm keeping my options open.
|
Hello Exi....So sorry you're feeling this way. Been there, done that. I know when my depression is in control it can be really painful to be with people. If I'm not actually breaking out into tears, I know sometimes it shows on my face, and when I feel that way I just want to vanish from wherever I am. Sending warm wishes and hopes that some comfort will come your way as soon as possible.....
ps....Not that you want to hear me preach, but drugs and alcohol, not such a good idea
