Quote:
Originally Posted by Shishkeberry
I'm so sorry you are related to douches.  But your dad is just as bad as her, he's just quieter. He is a grown man and he could have (and should have) protected you from her. He gets something out of it. Most likely that when she's abusing you she's not abusing him. Or even more horrible is that he agrees with her but enjoys being thought of as the "nicer" parent while she does all his dirty work. He could always leave her if he wanted to. He's no victim here.
...
I'm willing to bet that your mom is a narcissist, your dad is her enabler, and you are the scapegoat. Does that sound about right? Have you ever visited the "daughters of narcissistic mothers" website? |
((((Shish)))) I just looked at the site and read some of the descriptions...that is totally my mother (NPD to a "T"), my sister (N and Golden Chld), my brother (N and Golden Child) and my father (Enabler). Gaslighting, Scapegoating, Triangulation...and ugh...I see it more clearly now.
Oh for God's sake. I feel like such an idiot.
I have so many emotions swirling around inside: I don't know whether to be happy, angry, sad, bawl my eyes out...all the time and energy I've wasted trying to "get through" to them
It was all there in B&W.
Why didn't anyone tell me? It is so obvious and clear. My best friend that I've known since we were infants IS AN MFCC. We grew up together. Literally. She saw everything. Why didn't SHE say something?!
(OK, here is another "ahh haah" moment: that is why it's not a fabulous idea to be friends with your T
)
***
And the "Low Contact" ... it does hurt tremendously they dropped me like an old newspaper.
"No Contact" is the best and only solution in order for me to even have one iota of a chance of having / living a life.
Thank you so much for the link
And to everyone for the support, kind words and
.