Just a quick history, i have suffered deep depression and anxiety on and off for about 30 years. i have been on medications at times and am currently on 3 different anti-depression meds for treatment of physical illnesses that i have, i have alot of problems comprehending this overwhelming depression and anxiety that i have suffered the past 4 months. i have had several more health issues come up in my life and have begun accepting them and learning how to deal with them. So, with that being said i began something yesterday that i have wanted to do and have attempted to do most of my life. i can not tell you how much relief i have found and it just feels right and i feel really good about it. not to offend anyone, but i have alot of people praying for me and my family throughout all of this. btw, i have started writing a book. i am also making decisions that im confident about and eager to start moving up again in my life. when i return to work next month from medical leave, i plan on turning in my notice the very day i go back. i also plan to pursue 2 different career plans after spending about 8 years in retail, before that i was everything from a preschool teacher aide to a school bus driver. i love to work and come from a long line of work aholics, lol. i am feeling almost myself again, but still seeking treatment with a medical professional, waiting on them to call with my initial appointment. i just feel goodness all around and its something i havent felt for a very long time. im not afraid to face today or tomorrow or my future and am feeling ready to take it head on because i know im going to be okay. i dont believe i am completely well and back to myself, but the depression is almost in check again and the anxiety levels i have been having are not near as ominous as they have been. i just want to reach out to someone who can relate to all this and tell you to hang in there, things will get bettter. i have always believed that todays problems are tomorrows solutions and were not in this alone.