I don't have BDD but I have horrible self-esteem and sometimes anger and depression about my appearance and body. I think I'm more than just ugly in a lot of ways. I was badly bullied as a kid by both adults and peers about my looks when I was young. But, it goes beyond that. I actually often don't even associate with my reflection. I startle myself in the mirror because I don't associate what I see with how I picture myself in my head. I have a completely different body, a completely different face, completely different hair.

Even when I don't feel startled looking in the mirror I feel like I'm looking at myself in a costume or it just feels very unrealistic.

I remember as a little girl I thought when I turned into a teenager I would become a new person and shed my old skin and body and transform (kind of like how the ugly duckling becomes a swan.) When that didn't happen it was a huge disappointment.