My ex wanted to try and remain friends after I filed for divorce and moved out. He even went so far as requesting we still have sex until we found other people. (much to my surprise, he'd been seeing someone before I'd even moved out and couldn't wait to "release the sexual tension that is so great between us." The idiot left a message board open on our mutual computer, logged on, with his PMs up for viewing. Gee, ya think maybe he wanted to get caught? ). Then he requested that he come over and see if we/he were/was sexually aroused by each other/me at all, because he wanted to find out if we/he were/was really over each other/me. Just a few weeks earlier this is the guy who was on his knees sobbing and begging to try and make it work because his life would be meaningless without me. Oh brother.

My boyfriend from after my divorce broke up after an old, platonic female friend re-entered his life and he wanted to be able to see where it went sexually. At least he honored my request to break it off before he cheated on me. He even made a call to her while we were on vacation, after I'd fallen asleep. I saw the charge to the room and asked if he'd called to see how the dog was doing. His answer was a hesitant, awkward "uhhhhh, yeah." He said he had to have several people in his life to fulfill all of his needs. His guy friends were his "go out and get ***** faced buddies." This girl was his "download 80's MP3s and reminisce buddy." Supposedly I was his "snuggle up on the couch and "do stuff" buddy." (Yeah, how juvenile. The guy was 34 and referred to being sexually intimate as "doing stuff.") I told him the new girl seemed more than willing to take over my buddy role. It didn't make matters any better that she was a stripper in a "take EVERYTHING off" club.

Some exes will make requests that just aren't feasible. Yes, I can understand you still being emotionally attached to him even if you don't want to be. That really seems to be the hardest part to let go of, even if the emotions aren't necessarily positive ones.

Since he wants something that you can't agree to, and he doesn't want to be together as a couple, I'd say this is one of those instances where you're going to have to be strong for your own well being and cut it off, regardless of how he feels about it. He's sure not taking your feelings into consideration by getting angry when you say you can't honor his request to remain friends.

It seems my ex-H had a thing of wanting to put up a front that everyone likes him, always, even ex girlfriends/wives. Kind of a "Look. I'm such a great guy, no one can resist me. Wouldn't you love to have a boyfriend like that?" Oh gag. Sure, I want to be in a relationship where you're still best buddies with everyone you ever had sex with. Not.

It's taken six years and a lot of bitterness on my part to let it all go. We have kids, so I still have a minimal amount of contact with him, like it or not.

Sorry for the rant.