So the family history actually brings a little more light to the bus scene. It appears to me like perhaps you think the mistakes your family is making is bringing the whole family, yourself (and as we see with the mother later, your daughter as well) into the hell of consequences. Blood is blood, so perhaps there's a fear that you hold these same traits that are driving everyone into the hell pits? Also, finding someone worth knowing might be a desire to get to know your family more beyond them being a flock of black sheep.

Being so closed off about vulgarity and sexuality can also be a forced repression of tendencies that might be shared between you and your mom. Just a thought

Having a 4 yr old of my own, you might try being straight wit hher about how she feels about things. When she says "But I can't handle it" ask why. From there you might find an oppertunity to bond with your daughter and calm her own anxieties abotu you. Just a little help parent to parent That definately relates the mom to the burning hosue though, considering you're basically trapped by your anxiety and in turn she is getting the same message. I get the feeling the house has to do with your anxiety. Not sure what it means yet...we'll see.

The water could be a symbol for you being drudged down (like how it's hard to wade through water), or it could be a building up of emotions (especially if it gets deeper as it gets closer to the house burning down).

We all get weary. Bad things will continue to happen and nobody in their right mind would think it absurd for you to feel tired of all these pits of despair and stress. The key is just to roll with the punches, and maybe remind ourself that bad times are what helps us appreciate how good the good times are. And if all else, you can always come here and talk about your problems ^_^

It occurs to me, if you've been thinking about your past a lot lately it may be triggering stress anxiety.

:: Fun Fact! ::
Neurological science has proven that when we remember things, our brain treats the memories as if the events are actively occuring at that moment. So the phrase "don't live in the past" has a literal grounding - we relive our memories as if they're in the here and now.

Now oyu know, and Knowledge is Power!