Thanks you guys. I am doing alot of thinking. I dont have a way to even get back to the states right now so I guess its ok to see if he can "prove" himself for a little bit. I am not giving in too much. I said in order for me to give him another chance I ahve to open my heart again and that scares me. He said I dont have to do that. He will so the work and I just have to see. It's real confusing. I wish I could have left weeks ago. At the extreme earliest I would be able to go in April.
I have seriously considered staying with my friend but without a car and the ability to buy one it wont work. I wont be able to get a job. ITs a bit screwed up.
My husband went to a funeral this week for a friend who died suddenly of a heart attack. He was only 29. It really hit my husband and he said he felt we were wasting time living apart. He wants to live together and really get going on being together and making a life. He said he realized life is short and we shouldnt waste time. I told him I agreed and I have felt that way always. The problem is for 2 years I ahve been sitting in this dead end and I dont want to do it anymore. Sometimes he actually gets stuff!!
Anyway, I am just rambling. I am stuck here for now so I wont put much into anything but maybe a miracle will happen. I will know if it does and staying is the right thing to do. If not I'm outta here.
Heidu