Sorry if someone posted something similar. I couldn't find it anywhere.

I have a problem, when I make someone upset, I cannot seem to get over it. Especially if it involves customers. I will lose sleep and it will take over my mind until it's resolved or something else happens. The whole "Stop, and think about something else" thing simply does not work for me. No matter how hard I try to think of better things, it creeps back. It stresses me out so bad to know I made someone mad and gave them an unpleasant experience.

It seems, that when I upset someone, they just don't simply go away and never talk to me again. No, they must return time after time after time to remind me of how stupid I am. This isn't one person or a group of people. This is probably where it gets confusing. It's just random people. It's customers from the consignment shop I work at. Mainly, the ones that don't' want to follow contract rules or think they are privileged because another girl I work with let's them do whatever they want, or something out of my hands happen but I'm blamed for it anyway. They always come back with that look of "I'm going to make your life heck". and continue to get me to bend the rules for them and if I ever do I'm always caught and get a nice "talk" from the owner.

The last job I had, same with some customers, returning to get me to bend the rules and risk my job for them. But this time I had co-worker bullying. I was in the running to take the place of a manager when they retired and this didn't go well with one girl. So she gathered a group of employees to go against me and make me quit. It's very complicated and talking to the manager's did nothing since she was a favorite. So I did quit.

Also, some people at the apartments I live in. The maintenance lady got mad at me because my garbage bag ripped while trying to take it out and she yells "I'm not picking that up! I'm leaving a note on your door!" when I was calmly telling her it was an accident and was cleaning it up. Now if she sees me around the complex, she gives me a terrible look like she just doesn't want me there. Same for a few neighbors because I forgot a doggie bag once but they seem to have forgotten that I did come back and picked up my dog's mess. They like to watch me when I take my dog out now. There's no privacy!

So I believe this is why it's hard for me to get over things. Because no one will let me get over things. I dread the next day all the time because I know I have to pay for the mess-ups I've done. I know this may sound ridiculous but I am not over exaggerating these things. I feel like people just see me as someone to vent all their anger and frustration on. I feel like the world's punching bag and they're all out to get me!

I don't want to feel this way anymore. I just want a normal life and be happy. I want to make people happy.