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Aug 24, 2012, 06:24 AM
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Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 73
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Hi all,
Finally got my appointment. Hoping for some revelations. Thought I'd paste my email to her up here and keep you all informed (heck, maybe a future reader will find it helpful).
Will post an update later. My only fear is that she will tell me I'm focusing on it too intently.
Have a great day.  Happy friday!
Quote:
dear Dr. NAME
Hoping you have time to read this prior to Friday, I thought perhaps a summary of my concerns could be helpful (and ensure I don’t forget anything or act less concerned then I actually am).
You advised me earlier this year that not everything negative about my personality is necessarily indicative of an underlying concern, something that i’ve been holding on to. As a result, I looked at myself with more openness and was able to differentiate between myself, and what i believe to be problems (for example, a bit of arrogance and passive aggressive dismissals – that’s me through and through).
I began to loosely make note of various things, i now feel that i have enough ‘evidence’ to seek further advice. They definitely serve as a detriment to my personal and academic life, which isn’t ideal at this stage of the year. Core issues are:
1. unstable moods, seemingly cycling, without any discernible triggers or traceable causes.
a. mood 1: Good, happy, ok – calm, relaxed, proactive, intelligent, reasonable and resilient. Can fake it, but it takes effort and enhances agoraphobia and desire for isolation. Also frequently employed in adult/adult relationships (lecturer, therapy, etc). empathetic responses present (if not necessarily felt).
b. mood 2: Strained, fragile, hollow – can remain neutral, but frequently brings about irritation/short-temperedness & argumentativeness, inability to focus, snappish behaviour. This is when lack of interest begins to negatively impact social/academic functioning. Lashing out at those who i feel belittle me, common here. Also lash out when friends/girlfriend do something/talk to someone i disapprove of. (empathetic responses minimal)
c. mood 3: depression – lack of energy, lack of interest, lack of empathy. Failure to meet obligations, little care for consequences. Agoraphobia, loss of appetite, preferring darkness.
2. suicidal idealisation/imagery.
moods alternate, lasting between 2-6 days each. Almost always, all three present over 14-18 day period.
Girlfriend/friends notice difference between positive and negative moods, comments frequently made. Been asked if i’m drunk (both for happy and depressed moods), worried girlfriend when she was away for a trip because i sounded ‘completely different’ on the phone/on social media, and was acting overly social.
Sorry for the long-windedness, just want to make sure i don’t forget anything.
Warm regards & see you on Friday
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Current medication (Stress):
Venlafaxine 150 mg
Previous Medications:
Citalopram, Stresam, Espiride, Lamotrigine, Wellbutrin, Epilim (Valproate)
Previously diagnosed Bipolar Type II (11/12)
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