Quote:
Originally Posted by fishsandwich
There is this guy at work that I *really* don't like. He's crude, he's arrogant, he comes in looking like he slept under a bench, and he puts his feet up on the desk and eats ice cream while he does his job. During the Olympics, he kept making comments about which women were "f*cukable" and "not f*ckable".
So um . . . yesterday he started talking about rape. First it was just that Republican in the US who said those idiotic things about rape and pregnancy, which was fair enough as we work in the media. But then he went on to talk about this woman he knows who was raped (including describing it in graphic detail and saying she got "Julian Assange'd") and then making jokes about how it's not rape if you yell "SURPIRSE!" first. Anywhere, he kept going on like that for well over an hour, kind of flipping back and forth between talking about rape and sex.
Yeah. At that point I couldn't take it any more, so I left. I don't want to go back but my job starts in an hour. I'm only in this miserable job because I got raped anyway (the trauma stopped me from arranging any other employment or doing particularly well on my last degree) and ergh. We don't have HR and most of the staff in this company come from a culture where rape "doesn't happen" and sexual harassment in the workplace is just "being friendly" so . . . not sure if I can stop it.
Anyway, sorry, that was my rant.
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...I don't like to cuss here. I honestly don't. But what an *********!!!! You'll forgive me if I would rather like to punch him on your behalf?
How old is this guy? I remember those sorts of "jokes" when I was...oh, maybe 16? And back then, the maturity to really process what you're actually talking about isn't quite there.
That's...pathetic of him, to say the least. I really can't type out what all I want to say to this guy.
Are you sure there's no way you can bring this up with someone? Maybe your boss? It's just cruel that you have to sit there and listen to him make these beyond infantile "jokes" while you know the reality of things.
I wish I could help you more with your question.
I usually advise therapy in cases like this, but if you said it wasn't working for you...I don't know what else I can tell you.
I do think though that you have every right to think of yourself as a virgin. It's not at all a lie to say you are. You had the opportunity to be a "technical" virgin taken from you, and you couldn't help that. But since then, you've lived a life in accordance with those morals and the value of celibacy, no? THAT is your choice, and that is what you have done. You, I firmly believe, are truthful in calling yourself innocent, and I believe you deserve that peace of mind.
