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Aug 24, 2012, 03:55 PM
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Member Since: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,565
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Quote:
Originally Posted by button30
As my t never really explained this or anything about what happens during the therapeutic process, I am wondering why it is important that you attach to your T. I can understand that their is an element of trust involved but why must we attach?
I attached to my T and she didn't really like it, at first she encouraged me to ring and text, I didn't abuse it but suddenly it was not ok to do that anymore. I got very attached but didn't abuse her privacy or genorousity, I honestly can't see how this attachment in therapy helps as it only hurt me.
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Attachment is one of my favorite subjects.. and I wish I didn't have to get ready to go to work and could say more.
In short though, I think attachment is most beneficial to those who were emotionally neglected or abandoned in childhood. In response to my early experiences, I created a self-reliance and independence that ended up falling in the 'insecure attachment' category with respect to relationships. I'd learned I could not rely on anyone to care about my needs. My therapist was big on attachment, and just hearing her talk about it gave me the willys. I fought it tooth & nail. It took a long time, but eventually it sneaked up on me and attachment just happened. That unleashed a flurry of emotional instability.. but my therapist was wholly there for me. Through my attachment to her, I found out what a safe and healthy attachment feels like. I developed the capacity for genuine healthy intimacy. Best of all, I've been able to incorporate what I learned into my real life relationships. Not all therapists 'get' attachment theory, but I'm really glad mine was into it - because it made all the difference in the world for me.
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