Everytime I get the tiniest bit upset or mad, I need to cut. Each cut... I go deeper. It's like... my emotional pain shows more, and goes deeper... everytime a cut goes deeper. My arm is covered in deep gashes, and it's been hours... theyre still bleeding. All I could think while I was doing it... was there's nothing like the first deep gash on clean flesh. I need the tearing, burning feeling on my skin. I need to feel the blade tear through my flesh... and I need to see the blood pour from me. I can't live without it. It's the greatest feeling in the world, for me. Even though i end up more depressed afterwards.