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Well, elfina, I also wonder nearly ALL THE TIME why I have to live a miserable obsessive waste of a life like that, while girls all around me are enjoying their times... But then I widen my view & try to think a bit more GLOBALLY or UNIVERSALLY... I find that there are millions of people living miserable lives, even worse than me probably... Children dying of hunger & all kinds of illnesses eating at their tiny bodies, people tortured with cancer & waiting for their looming deaths, people living in war-zones who keep on hiding underground & listening to bomb-shells & F16 fighters hunting for them while we listen to music safely in our homes, & prisoners kept in underground dungeons & being tortured everyday until they die lonely in their solitary cells just 'cause of their different religious/political/racial identities in autocratic states...
Actually, you might find that people who are waiting for their merciful deaths in their tortured lives in this world ACTUALLY MIGHT OUTNUMBER people who enjoy their lives #_# Why do you think all those sufferings?!
I strongly believe that God is Just, & he created all this suffering in life for some, while others have normal lives, for a reason... He's testing us & testing our strength of belief in Him & in His Justice, so if we succeed He will greatly compensate all our suffering for much greater enjoyment & rest later in life, or if not in this life, then He will award us with unimaginable enjoyment & peacefulness in the after-life, only if we keep on holding on, believing, & perseveringly fighting against all suffering in this world... I know it's much easier to give in & not believe in God or Justice or after-life & just keep on suffering & hating the whole world for it! But then... without belief, we would have no reason to live for...
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