I'm right there with you Tomi.

It feels to me that those of us who come across a little harder and tougher and further in our healing don't get any slack. When we fly off the handle after everything gets to be too much, then we get to read about how our actions hurt another. Don't people understand that continuing to talk about how mean and horrible someone was only makes that "mean, horrible" person feel worse and even MORE ready to lash out?

The thing for me is that it takes a lot for me these days to finally get to the lashing out point. Usually I'm behind the scenes working out my frustrations with a close friend. When the amount of "I've been hurt"s on the board gets to be too much THAT'S when I finally snap.

I've told myself this last week that I'm not coming back here either, but after 16 months it's become a habit that's not easy to break, even though I end up feeling worse more often than not after reading up.

When my online interactions negatively impact my interactions with real people, or even go so far as to PREVENT me from wanting to meet real people, that's a sign that this place isn't healthy. I think you can develop unhealthy communications techniques in a place like this way more than you can develop healthy ones.