Thanks for the feedback, all. Really appreciate everyone on these forums and how helpful you all are. Truth is, I'm very confused. I'm not sure that I have any "real" relationships with anyone anymore... Everyone's just kinda here.

I realized that a lot of my friendships were based on smoking & drinking.. Kinda threw me for a loop, because those are two things I've done a good job not doing (for my mental and physical health) the past month or so.. Which means I haven't really talked to any of my "friends." I have lots of people throughout the day that I talk to, because I'm generally a charming and very friendly person, but no true confidants, ya know?

This is probably for another subject, but it's definitely tied in: I've had several really, really close friends and confidants... two of them were girlfriends, and the other 3 and I had a real close bond. But each of these close friends and I had fallings out (some more severe than others), and I don't talk to any of them any more. I think it keeps me from really letting anyone get close.. Lol I'm confused as ****.. But I know I'll figure it out eventually. Until then, I'll keep asking you all for advice, Thanks.