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Old Aug 30, 2012, 12:00 PM
BaksAspen BaksAspen is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2012
Posts: 2
Hi everyone,

First, I want to thank every brave person on here for letting me and everyone needing help, feel like we're not alone. I've been diagnosed with BPD since 2001 and I haven't taken any counseling or therapy because I have no insurance. So I try to read as much as possible and try to work things out and it has been an uphill battle.

But here is my concern now, the last year or so I have been daydreaming a lot, daydreaming that I am someone else with a totally different personality and I'm starting to feel emotions from this. Let me give some details.

I am very metro-sexual, I'm 35 but look like I'm in my early 20's. I'm very feminine and very emotional and people say I am the kindest, sweetest man they have ever met. I'm very childish and watch more cartoons than adult shows and my two kids love it because they have a grown up kid to play with. But when I have an emotional episode where I "think or feel" that someone has done me wrong, I start to think like that wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin, lol. I literally feel like a red neck (absolutely no offense) and get very, very aggressive. I talk differently, start using language that I don't normally use, I get very, very confident and that train of thought makes me feel good after it. I like it because I feel like I have a big brother step in and help me.

It's scary because it's not me, but it feels good because I feel protected by this other "personality" that will not let anyone take advantage of me. Has it gotten to the point that I go into therapy, or is it a defense mechanism to help me cope? Anyone with similar experiences? Any thoughts? Thanks!
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