OK, I'm coming in to this totally clueless, because I don't see a thread started by Determined in here, but I do have to agree with LMo. Everyone is looking for something different. Well, maybe not EVERYONE, but there are some guys out there that are looking for someone just like you.

I was raised in a household where affection wasn't displayed between my mom and dad. I got it from my mom, and I got it from my dad, but I never saw it between the two of them as a couple. However, no one was huggy or vocal with their "I love you's" so I always felt a little squidgy when I started coming into contact with people who did grow up like that. I've come to really appreciate it though, so there is always room for positive change.

My ex moved on to a "serious" relationship really quickly. That left me wondering "what is wrong with me that I'm still alone and he's running around dating and having (what I thought was) the time of his life" Turns out he's just needy and needs to feel useful and in control, and the only way he gets that is to latch on to another person and do everything for them.

I, on the other hand, took my time, got into a relationship, and when it ended got scared again. I took a 4-year break from actively seeking another partner. It finally took coming to PC and seeing that I do have positive to things to offer someone just the way I am.

Don't look so far ahead that you can only see yourself as married or alone. There's a LOT of middle ground. A lot of guys aren't looking for a wife either. Find someone who just wants someone to hang out with. I just met someone who's mindset is "I'm really happy with my life the way it is, I don't need a woman, but it's REALLY nice to have someone to share things with."

I worked on myself to the point where I felt comfortable branching out and welcoming someone in, even though I don't feel like I'm "finished" by any means. We're all works in progress. If you wait until you think everything is taken care of, you'll be waiting until you're in the grave. Life isn't static, we're going to be constantly changing, for the good or bad.