Hi cthonica

I hear what you are saying, I never did the safe touch, keep doing it until body memories disappear, I'm not comfortable with asking my boyfriend to touch me.

I seem to have my body memories the most with the back of my neck because that is where he always use to grab, squeeze and yell. I remember just freezing, not being able to move, all I did was cry...

I rarely get triggered now and I feel wonderful about that obviously, but I don't want to have to put myself in that situation, cause then it ruins the rest of my day/night. A name use to trigger me, his name for obvious reasons, as well as being called woman, it still actually bothers me cause my guy still says that to me once in awhile, but I try and not let myself be bothered my it because what happend to me is in the past, and I can't be living in the past anymore and feeling the shame and the guilt. Yes I regret that it happened, but I can live with the regret of things, not the guilt..I'm tired of blaming myself for it, when it was all him...

I'm definatly feeling more empowered, and i've never EVER said that or felt that before.

Take care,

<font color=red>~Sundance~</font color=red>

<font color=blue>"Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business."</font color=blue>

<font color=black>Norman Vincent Peale</font color=black>