Well, you have to be a bit more "clever" in how you get the information as it is always normal for any child that is making an effort to be independant to resist giving out information in fear of getting the result of some kind of disapproval.

I wanted to know if my mother was being given antidepressants while she was in recovery after her back surgery. I knew that my sister chose to go against the surgeons direction to not have my mother evaluated or given antidepressants as it was going to take her time to recover from the anethesia. My sister didn't listen and had my mother evaluated and ofcourse antidepressants were prescribed.

Well, instead of my trying to go against my sister's choice, which she would not appreciate any of "my input" if it didn't go along with "her allknowingness" I had to find a way to "praise" instead of critique or question.

I talked to my sister about the fact that I was diagnosed with PTSD and needed to find an antidepressant. I told her that I was like my mother in being "a cheap drunk' so I wanted to know what my mother was taking so I could try it as well. So, that gave me the open door to hearing what my mother was put on and how it was "thought" she was responding well.

So what you "could do" is discuss the fact that you are constantly dealing with a sore neck and muscle aches. And you are trying to take "aspirin" and it is not working. That may give an open door for either AJ or his girlfriend to "think" they might have an answer and tell you to try "such and such muscle relaxer".

I am sure that to a certain extent you are figuring out that information comes faster when you "play dumb" and look more willing to be "guided" rather than you being the one that will present some kind of "critique".

Sigh....because my sister is the "all knowing need to control" and "walks away or shuts off when I make a suggestion that doesn't go with Her agenda", I have had to learn how to get around that problem.

Open Eyes