Thanks Carrie,

I wanted to talk about this too, and didnt quite feel safe on the general board. I guess some people keep up mainly with the higher volume boards, but I get overwhelmed and fall back to my particular niches, this one being my main niche. For one thing, there are not so many of us here to keep track of, and for another, we are all dealing with some of the same issues. Nothing wrong with the other boards and the rest of the members of this site, but when I'm frazzled or otherwise not able to keep up with everything, this is where you will find me.

The world these days seems to would like to pretend that religion does not exist, sweep it under the carpet, hide it, and ostracize people for whom spirituality is central to their lives. It didn't used to be that way. Yes, religion has been a factor in war and violence throughout the history of the earth, and that's not what we want, but the whole reason behind that is that it means so much to people, and not always in the same way. Spirituality is still important, and pretending that it does not exist is not the answer. We all need to recognize that our beliefs are not universally held by all, even though we may be very sure that the way we believe is right. That doesn't mean that everyone else is wrong. I believe that there is truth in all religions, maybe to a greater or lesser degree, but they all have something that I can learn from and I would rather look for that than jump all over the differences.

Religion and spirituality are also part of psychology and of healing. For more information on how these topics fit together, here is a page where you can find some links: <A target="_blank" HREF=http://www.tulsa.oklahoma.net/~jnichols/religion.html>http://www.tulsa.oklahoma.net/~jnichols/religion.html</A> In my Health Psychology class this semester it was taught that there are 3 (4) domains of health, which are: biological, mental/emotional/psychological, social, (and spiritual). That is how it is presented, with the fourth domain being optional. Yet it is there and should be there as it does make a difference even if some people are not comfortable with it. Is everyone always comfortable about the other domains of health either? Religion also came up in Personality Theory, as quite a few of the best known personality theorists had a lot to say about religion (see the links on that page above), and also in my Interviewing and Counseling class. One aspect of counseling is finding value, or meaning in life. For a lot of people that means religion or spirituality. Without value or meaning, what's the point of living?

To get to your questions:
<font color=green>1. How important is religion/spirituality to your healing process?</font color=green> Crucial! As I just said, without value or meaning (which to me does include spirituality), life is pointless. Why even bother to keep trying if there is no point?

<font color=green>2. How can we bring these topics up in our responses and threads without offending other people...how can we maintain respect for one anothers ideas?</font color=green> I tend to avoid bringing up these topics because I know that they can lead to tension and conflict. Also, since I'm LDS, and Mormons are known for being pushy about religion, I work that much harder not to look like I am trying to impose my beliefs on anyone, but I still would like to be open about my beliefs and would love to discuss them if any of you want to. Sometimes it is just easier to take that kind of discussion away from the public forums and keep it rather in PM's and chat, which tend to be a more intimate setting. When we share our beliefs on a public forum that can be read by anyone who has internet access, maybe we are opening ourselves up to potential attack, since there are people out there who just look for conflict. Casting your pearls before swine isn't your best move. Not that the members here are swine, but you never know who might be reading the forums. So we need to choose the appropriate setting and timing, and before sharing precious beliefs, be sure that we are able to withstand the potential of an attack. Another thing would be to present beliefs as just that - not proven facts that are necessarily universal. Say, "this is something that helps me," or "I believe that...", etc. Don't assume that everyone reading your belief shares it or will become convinced. Whenever you make a statement that may conflict with the other person's views, it will tend to be received best if you state it tentatively, making it clear that you are offering the idea but not trying to cram it down their throat.

<font color=green>3. How can we tap into the healing aspect of spirituality while at the same time avoid the warring nature of religious difference? </font color=green> We all need to respect each other's beliefs. We need to remember that someone isn't wrong just because our beliefs may not match up. If you find that you disagree with someone's position, if you feel that you need to say anything, again state your beliefs tentatively, making it clear that they are your beliefs. Recognize the difference between facts and opinions. If I say, "the sky is blue" most people won't argue because they can look out the window and see that the sky appears to be blue. But if we are talking about beliefs, we need to say "I believe that ..." or something along those lines, because people might not accept the belief, but they can't really argue with the fact that it is what you believe. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree.

<font color=green>4. Is it possible to do in a environment such as this?</font color=green> I think so.

<font color=green>5. Is it desireable to even try?</font color=green> My feeling is that this is an essential part of the healing process and cutting it out leaves a great big huge gap. But it can be overdone too, and we need to use caution not to overemphasize these topics or make them seem mundane or make people uncomfortable too often. Spirituality is powerful, and in this environment probably needs to be used sparingly and with caution and sensitivity.

Wendy



<font color=orange>There is an easy answer to your problem that is neat, plausible, and wrong.

</font color=orange>