Sounds like the way I was 5 years ago. You are holding onto a lot of stuff, and much of it you could drop with a little help. (ie family members issues). The financial stuff is big because it threatens your security and your instinctual base needs and I'm betting you feel like a failure because of it (which amplifies everything else). Take a deep breath and know that this is all fixable and this is only a rut that you can climb out of.

I went from the big house on the hill with debt beyond control, to now where I am living in a little house in the valley and with savings accounts instead of debt. I have never been happier and everything else fell into place. It wasn't easy, but it sure was worth it. Now my days are spent doing what I enjoy instead of working harder and harder to go nowhere.

Going from my experiences, swallow your pride and go see a financial counsellor and take their advise. It is actually a lot of fun learning how to be frugal. At the same time, find a therapist. Mine was free through the government because I did not have the money to pay for it. (This might be an avenue for you, too). Definately do NOT work harder because all you will do is dig that rut deeper.

As for your family, they are incapable of supporting you so don't involve them or even tell them what you are doing. Let their issues be theirs.

I know it is terrifying as you might feel like you are falling and don't know how far you can go, but take heart, because once you have a plan, although painful at times, you will smile one day again.

Those are just my thoughts from reading what you wrote. I wish you resolution and peace. We are all here for you.