I am really struggling with life in general at the moment. I have a gambling problem that is slowly but surly crushing me. I hate the lies and the deceit and the double life I lead. I began gambling aged 13/14 and was probably hooked by about 17/18. I went to University when I was 19 and lasted just a couple of weeks before I blew all my money and had to come back home. I told my parents I just didnt like the course and thats why I left. I then began stealing scrathcards from the shop I worked at to pay for my addiction. That inevitably cost me my job. As it was the local newsagents I worked at everyone in the area were friends or knew either me or my family. I cannot even begin to express how ashamed I still feel for what I did. Things started to go well though without gambling, I got a new job, went maybe 12 months without a bet, met a girl, enjoyed my job, repaid debts and began saving money. Gradually though I began to feel that life wasnt great. My girlfriend left me, I lost all intrest in my job, I had money but nothing to spend it on and no excitement in my life. Nothing that compared to gambling or stealing anyway. Here and there I would sneak a few bets on nothng major but it gave me an occassional buzz. I moved out from my parents so that I could gamble online whenever I wanted. I barely afforded my 2nd months rent and this month I might not be so lucky. Thing is I hate my life without gambling. Im lonely, weak, going absolutely nowhere, dont have many friends and do not trust myself. I want to go back to Uni next year but I can only see it ending badly. I want to quit gambling for good because I know it will destroy me. I have been to GA in the past and have seen people in crippled by gambling. I want to quit but the prospect of a life without gambling is depressing. Other than gambling I have nothing to look forward to, because of gambling I have nothing to look forward to. Sorry for the long post just wanted to get a few thoughts off my chest. Thanks for reading.