I know I've been a danger to others in the past, I know this was swept under the carpet. I know that was a long time ago and it's just been verbal stuff as of late...I know I avoid social interaction for this reason in case of ''going off on one''. I know the anger scares me too. I've had violent thoughts about being violent in the CMHT...I know these were dismissed by Social Worker who said she doesn't think I would harm anyone. Dumbest quote I've heard...who's to say who will do what?!

I read about that Holmes guy, I read about how he had tried to contact his Psychiatrist 9 minutes before the shooting, had sent a notebook to his college Professor with violent imagery of a massacre, had sent texts to college peers asking about dsyphoric mania (bi polar), stated that he was bad news, I believe his Psychiatrist had even contacted that University Psych Team or something along those lines but then he dropped out of Uni and they had no jurisdiction to supervise him. I can't help feel that this guy, as messed up as he clearly is, was desperately trying to call out for help.

I worry that it's the ''isolated'' types who tend to be murderers, who tend to alienate themselves for whatever reason and then find it hard to ''come back'' and be on a normal level with people. This Holmes guy was described as painfully shy, socially awkward but highly intelligent.

I worry that there's maybe this need to do something before someone will listen. I think it is so sad how the authorities have clearly failed this guy - if he was sectioned it wouldn't have solved everything, but it would have been a temporary measure. Instead the only solution is to alienate him further.