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thanks for the reply. so my next thought is why do you wish you were gone? is life no longer worth living without the "psychotic passion" you mentioned?
we all have a choice re using. perhaps you're not ready to live sober yet(?) or have you made the decision to live within the realm of sanity? have you ever considered why you feel the need to escape? seems that may be the answer to your struggle with sobriety.
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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