What is host resistance? How does it manifest itself?
I am trying to work with my t but she thinks the host might actually be resisting. I am the host, I am the one who gets us to therapy, I am the one who believes we need to integrate so we can feel at the same time we experience living. Something we don't do now. Everyone seems to understand and agree with what we are doing. I am trying to figure out what host resistance looks and feels like. There is a discussion I had with my t today about having my alters feel what each other feels.
I don't understand how to do that. When John (who is afraid) is in executive control he makes the decisions. He like almost all my parts don't talk to each other. They will talk to me and someone else might hear them and respond to me. But they don't talk to each other. They are aware of each other they just talk to me. There are three others that are fully functional in the world and they talk to each other. Most often they do not talk to me. I am aware of them and they are aware of me.
So if my fearful part is feeling fear I am somehow expected to have him also feel happiness. But the one who feels happiness already does that. What am I supposed to be doing? John's job is to feel fear and he presents that way. My happy one feels happy and inquisitive. That is who she is. I don't know if I have explained it well. I am just hoping someone will let me know what they felt when their host was resistant. My internal belief is that when my parts are no longer required to do their specific job separate from the original, they will integrate and all the feelings will be there to be felt.