you are not alone in that tmarie. it might be good to try to set a goal of getting past your fear so that you can get the benefit of treatment. maybe think of posting here as practice for talking with someone. maybe you can have someone you trust go with you to your first appointment to help ease the fear.

also remember that a good therapist understands that it is difficult for many people. they should be sensitive to that and work on establishing trust rather than just expecting you to pour everything out when you visit. it can take time to develop a trust but a good T will work with you on that. If they don't you should find a new T. Sometimes even the best T just won't have the right "style" that you feel comfortable with and you may have to try a few to find the one that is best for you. Don't let that discourage you, in this case you are like a consumer looking for the best help that fits your needs.

I doubt that any T will let you send someone in as "proxy" to speak with you. They may be willing to let you bring someone in with you for your first visit to help you feel more comfortable. Any real deep discussion will take place alone with you for the sake of your privacy.

If you feel you can't talk it may also help to write some of the things you are feeling down and take that with you. Maybe the T can read it or maybe you can read it too them as an alternative to just sitting there talking.

You can also see if group therapy might be appropriate for you. I really enjoyed group therapy, you bond with other people who share your problems and you don't feel as alone. While you still have to talk, you can follow the lead of others and don't have the pressure of being the only one there having to expressing your feelings.

If group therapy is not appropriate or not available you could look for a peer run support group in your area. There will be no professional counseling at these groups, just people sharing their experiences and helping one another (exactly what goes on here). If you can do that they may help you get over your fear of seeing a therapist also.

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