I feel the same way. I have a great partner, good job, idyllic childhood. . . but I still feel like crap. It doesn't make sense. I have learned that depression doesn't make sense. After 20 years I still get blindsided by bouts of depression. It does get easier, but it still sucks.

Work hard at believing that it will get better. Meds and therapy can help. Never feel stupid for sharing how you feel or for having those feelings. I'm new to this forum, but I'm rapidly learning that it's a safe place to share and vent.

I wish you strength