I don't know, James, perhaps I need to go back to the bp site to discuss this one, but I see alcohol and other drugs as coating my brain when it gets out of hand-it soothes me. Then I am told that I am abusing, and I have to go back to abstinence. Like everything in my life, it is a cycle. I finally make it to a mood where I think who is that person (me) who feels the need to find every mind altering drug in the house-all of the sudden I am calm and cool and in control. Give it a week or two...and then I am back to reading the posts here.