As ever Leed has given good advice. Sometimes numbness can be caused by shock and disbelief - everyone reacts differently to grief, theres no standard for how you should feel. I would definately research some grief counselling so that you can come to terms with your feelings in a way thats healthy and supportive. Im sorry to hear of your loss and i hope you continue to find this place comforting and supportive - check out the grief and loss board, talking to others who have experienced similar reactions may be helpful. All the best.