I want to update this story. I start a drug group on Wensday. It is a two hour group to teach people with mental illness how to cope without drugs. My ex fiance told me that this was my last chance. If I blow this chance he is going to walk away for good. Hearing him say this makes me want to get clean/sober even more. Like I said before he is the love of my life and the thought of losing him makes me cry so bad. His mother also said she would walk away if I didn't get clean/sober so I am doing this for them and myself. I have decided to throw myself into work and school to try to help me stay clean/sober. I have also not been to my sister's since I left. I have also cut off all contact with my friends who do drugs and drink to extremes. I am not going around that. It will mess up what I am doing. I have been clean/sober a week. I know that is not a big milestone but after two days of Detox I feel better.