Hi Bamapsych. Congrats on the new relationship.

Firstly, I'd tell you as I'd tell anyone else to hold your ground, and that if you're not comfortable doing something, don't. I'm happy you two are able to meet a sexual middle ground, but if he insists on "more" than what you're ready for, don't think for a moment that you're the one with any problem. You've made the decision to wait (which if I might add I think is commendable of you ), and he agreed to honor your commitment. If he can't, that's all on him.

But on to him...as a guy, I find "literally hours" to be absolutely unfathomable. I don't think it's you, particularly if your past 2-3 intimate relationships have been fine. Honestly...do forgive my bluntness, but I think darn near anything that isn't outright unpleasant would do the trick after hours. :/ So I think we can safely rule out you as the problem.

I really think he should bring this up with a doctor...have you asked him more about it? Does he suffer from a loss of sensation or damaged penile tissue or anything like that? I can't imagine an explanation for this that doesn't involve something not functioning correctly. I would encourage him to seek a doctor...though expect resistance. We aren't overly keen on discussing those sorts of things as a gender with our doctors.

Anyway, congrats on the relationship, and good for you for your religious values. God bless, and take care.