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Incredibly sad.
discouraged.
Angry.
Feel worthles and helpless to stop the downward spiral.
I HATE life.
Based on events in my life, the feeling is mutual.
I keep trying to find answers form God to make all this make sense.
It will make sense once I enter eternity, right?
I am not going to suicide or anything. Damn it. I can't do it. I am a f'ing survivor,,,, no matter how angry that makes. me
I wish I could kill me. but I am stuck here. I have to deal, no matter how horrible things get, I will survive. I should be grateful for this. I am not, It pisses me off. I wish I could just give up.
Since I cannot, I am here, on PC, asking for help, support, advice ro whatever.
I apologize for being needy, but this is me. YUCK. I hate being me. I am sorry I need help. I am not worth the effort, but I do appreciate it.
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Practicing being here now.
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