Let me ask you a very simple question: Do YOU think that gay men are lesser men than straight men because of what they enjoy sexually?

Just like there are plenty of gay men who are masculine, there are straight men who enjoy exploring themselves and are not considered feminine or sissies.

edit: Enjoying an-l sex does not mean you are less or more of anything. It means you have a fetish, and there are women like me who are dying to find a man who enjoys receiving an-l with a strap-on dildo. Because yes, I would love to show a man exactly why women love receiving an-l, and now you know why it feels so good.

If you'd like, I can message you the website of a BDSM social networking site where you can have a safe place to explore your sexuality (and trust me, there are a ton of guys on there who love an-l.) There are also BDSM hookup websites if you're looking for something more casual.

But there's nothing wrong with you. I'm currently searching for a guy who's into that as well as a relationship and it's definitely hard, but I'm really hoping to find a guy who's comfortable with his sexuality to experience that with.

I just read your note about telling people...don't. It's your body, your sex life, nobody else needs to know. No one else needs their approval of what you do. If there's one person you can trust with sharing that, and know that they won't judge you for it, fine, but really, they don't need to know that. That would be like telling my best friend I have a Nazi fetish when she's Jewish. There's a time and place for everything. The best person to confide about your fetishes is your therapist. They will not judge you, and even my T praised and welcomed my Nazi fetish. They'll listen to you and guide you.

Best of luck.