I had already been seeing p-docs since 2006, taking meds and having attempted sui, but I still did not believe that I needed meds or help. Then one day akathisia from Seroquel drove me crazy, I was extremely irritable, everything got to me, and I came to the realization that Seroquel was not working. I had just read the Unquiet Mind by Kay Jamison and, influenced by it, I checked myself into a hospital and asked for Lithium. Lithium was the first drug that helped. This was in 2009 and I was almost 40. Prior to Lithium, nothing - Depakote, Lamictal, Seroquel - helped at all.