Well, as some of you may know, ive haad the last couple of weeks off work due to an injury i have on my right shoulder. well its my first day back on thursday and in the last couple of weeks ive really worked on myself, mending a few damaged goods. but im dreading going back because i know that once i go back there, and am surrounded by those people it will slowly but surely destroy the work ive been doing. i cant get any stimulating conversations off anyone in there and i dont have much in common with people, they are all too shallow and engrossed in their own little world, and for me to be around people like that brings me down and i quickly become unhappy again, ruining all the work i have done in the last fortnight.

my interests and hobbies dont interest ANYONE in work so i dont talk about them, ive learnt not to because when i mention my music etc they are quick to try and put me down for it and destroy my positivity, so i tend to keep it away from them. and because i dont talk about them much (except necessary things!), i have to listen to what other people talk about, which is 90% of the time about their sex lives, 5% how much they love themselves, and the remaining 5% is all their "problems", like the fact they havent spoken to their partner for half a day...and in some cases they cry about things like that.

so because of all this negativity, by the time the working day is over and i get home, i feel like s**t and dont want to do anything. its really destroying me in there, but i cant leave because im trying to focus on my music and i need the regular income, its not so easy to just quit a job.

in the last fortnight i have been working really hard on myself, and i feel so much better for it. i have actually enjoyed the last couple of weeks (apart from my really bad days, in which i spoke of on here), but apart from that i feel it has done me SOOOOO much good, i often think "why should i go back there and be destroyed like that"...for instance, my manager doesnt believe me that i have an injury, and last week when i spoke to her (to tell her i have been signed off by my doctor) she said "well you cant just take time off when you feel like it, this is YOUR job") i mean, why would i lie about it, it makes me angry because she doesnt respect me nor trust me to believe the fact that i have got this injury...how immature of her isnt it.

comin here, to PC and seeing so many people have in-depth conversations and speaking to such genuine, friendly, caring people has helped loads too, i think you are all great and i wish i could have such interesting people around me all day everyday, i need that kind of thing to stimulate my mind because i am such a complex, deep person, and shallow conversations just go straight over my head.

has anyone got any advice for me, apart from "leave that place" hehe. i will appreciate any help on this.