Hey Deye,


Sounds like a stressful relationship to me. We can't personally tell you if you have BPD or not. Although, people who have Borderline often have 'abandonment' issues, this is not the only criteria for the disorder. You mentioned that you looked up the criteria and related to it, yes?

Have you asked you asked your therapist whether or not you show signs of having BPD?

To be honest, I would probably be jealous too! But, hey, I have BPD. I think many people would tell you that it's natural to feel hurt and despairing after a relationship ends. Some jealousy is normal and natural, especially when trust is still building.

So tell me, did you argue with her a lot? Get hostile and have a hard time controlling your emotions? Do you feel completely overwhelmed by your emotions A LOT of the time? Do you idealize her? Did you need constant reassurance that she wouldn't leave you? Do you feel a sense of complete emptiness and lonliness most of the time? Have you always had a hard time maintaining relationships and friendships in the past? Do you 'beat yourself up' often?

Some of the things you're feeling right now could very well be caused by separating from someone you care about. I would suggest to read more online about the disorder, read postings around here, too...can you relate? Talk to your therapist and ask questions...There is also a wonderful relationships forum here that can help you during this very hard time if you can't find answers here. Many people here understand what you're going through, break-ups are extremely difficult to begin with...