Hi Bathony. My exhusband was a victim of severe child abuse. I knew about it from the start and it's heartbreaking to think that others are suffering that way too. I get soooo angry about it. You never did deserve that abuse and you never will. Your mother has some very bad mental issues going on and needs some meds and therapy. Is your dad around? Maybe he can get her to go get some help. If it's possible you should try to get out of there. You are a very important person to this world. God made you and he made you just right. You are NOT stupid, or bad or dirty or any of those things. You need some therapy too so that this abuse stops here. You are not alone and I care very much what's happening to you. Please let us know how it's going. God Bless You Sweetie, you are in my prayers.