Thanks for the tips, Hamster.

Unfortunately, I did not log in until later in the day on Saturday.

My mother woke me up by calling at 9:00 a.m. I answered because, when your parents get to a certain age, you start to think you should answer their calls because they might be injured or something.

I was still asleep. She wanted to see me NOW to discuss finances.

I thought, "What the hell am I in trouble about now?"

Didn't shower. Just threw on clothes and went over there.

What a downer today has been.

I got lectured AGAIN for everything wrong I've ever done in my life, told how I need to turn myself around and fly right, etc.

She showed me her finances AGAIN and told me what she wants done with the houses, vehicles, CDs, and cash when she dies. I don't know why she finds it necessary to show me this stuff every year or so now, but she does.

Then she wanted to go to lunch. We went in one car. Big mistake. I was stuck with her from 10:00 a.m. until 5:00 p.m.

Highlight of the day was getting a text from my son saying he wanted to have dinner with me tonight. Just the two of us.

After the crappy day I had yesterday, feeling really lonely, it was great to spend time with him and chat over dinner. But I almost didn't make it. My mom thought we were going to keep going places and doing things together today.

I didn't say to her, "Hey, I need to go. ____ wants to have dinner with me," because it would have pissed her off and she would have demanded to come with us. That's just the way she is.

Still trying to work through the loneliness. It's terrible to be lonely when there is someone in the same house with you, but I don't want to dump too much on my son.

Monday I'm back to work, and I think I should call the psychiatrist to see about the Wellbutrin that he had mentioned. The weather here has turned quite gloomy, and this time of year always sinks my spirits.

Would be nice to feel like I've got my personality back. I'm not even "normal" for me and surely the lithium has worked its way out of my system by now.

For example, I've always been a freak about France. Always have wanted to go there. Son's girlfriend went a few years ago. Yesterday she showed me her photos on her computer and brought a really old book that she bought in France and has stored in a Zip-Lock bag. I opened it and smelled what France smells like. "Normal" me would have squealed, but I was kind of, "Meh. Whatever."